So blessed!

In light of the resent holiday I'd like to write a blog about all the wonderful things I have to be thankful for! I meant to do this on Thanksgiving but time got away from me! Which btw I am beyond Thankful that Hayden was out of the hospital and home to celebrate with us. Not only was she home but running around playing and eating spaghetti (hehe) just days after her 3rd round of chemo.

On Saturday the 26th The Hugs for Hayden benefit took place and around 700 friends and family came together to support monkey and raise money and awareness for her!! It turned out to be an amazing event and the money raised was out of this world! There will never be words to express how much this means to us and how grateful we are! It was truly amazing and a once in a lifetime event! I'm extremely thankful for the love and support of our family and friends. There is no way we could do any of this with you! Our family is what keeps us going through this difficult time and gives us strength and support when we need it most! Only because of our family were we able to come to Houston for Hayden's treatment and the continued financial support from both family and friends helps to keep us comfortable in our Houston apartment while we are away from home. This is such a huge blessing! Knowing how much love surrounds us is the most amazing feeling in the world!!!

I'm so thankful that we were able to do Hayden's treatment here in Houston. The proton radiation beam has been proven to greatly reduce some the horrible side effects of radiation. We didn't have a choice on the radiation and knowing that we were able to protect more of Hayden's healthy cells, tissues and organs made it much easier to move forward with the radiation. We are aware that some side effects aren't avoidable but being to reduce that list is a god send. The other amazing thing Houston offers is the stem cell transplant. As we all know stem cell usage is a controversial issue and it isn't available everywhere. Before chemo started the drs harvested healthy stem cells from Hayden's blood and after each round they are giving back to her. This allows us to attack her cancer more aggressively. The doses and types chemo being used are extremely high and toxic and with out the stem cell rescue we wouldn't be able use this protocol.  It seems like a bad thing to use stronger more toxic doses but when you're dealing with this type of cancer you have to have to fight fire with fire. After each round her body is completely depleted of all unhealthy cells but also of all healthy cells. The transplant along with many  blood transfusions brings her white and red blood cells up to much better levels. With out the transplant her immune system would never recover enough to start another round of chemo! It's also the reason we are able to complete her chemo in 4 months instead of 6-12 months, in some cases even longer. I'm so thankful for Texas Children's Hospital, M.D. Anderson the Proton Radiation Center, St. Judes, and Dell Children's Hospital. I know these places are where miracles happen and because of them Hayden will be cured of her cancer and have a second chance at life. When we found out that Hayden had a brain tumor I was scared and thought we didn't have a chance, I thought I would never be happy again, I was hopeless. Because of these places we have hope and having hope can erase fears, put smiles on your face and change the way you think, feel and view the situation, your life and even the world. I'm so thankful for them and the hope they have given to us and countless other families facing this monster.

I'm so thankful for Hayden's spirit and strength. She amazes me everyday. She is such a special little girl and I'm so proud of her. I thank god everyday for giving her the strength to beat this and make it look easy! If she wasn't bald you wouldn't have a clue this was happening to her. She is always smiling and laughing and that is the best gift I could have during this. I was reading a blog where a friend of ours going through the same thing brought up her son's age and how thankful she was that he wasn't quite old enough to understand the severity of this disease and I couldn't agree more. Hayden knows that something isn't right but she doesn't have the fear of it that we have. I'm thankful that all she knows is to feel better to play and laugh and run and dance. She doesn't know this supposed to hold her back or make her sick and so it doesn't as much it could... We have been surrounded by many children during this battle and I see all of them fight with grace and spirit so I know it's not just Hayden but there is something special about her and I know she will never give up. She was given special gifts that prepared her for this. She was born ready to fight and beat this! She is beyond amazing, she is a miracle. I love her more than life itself and I'm so thankful for her. I'm so thankful that she is doing so well. I can hardly believe it! This road has been hard and trying but nothing like I thought it would be. Her strength carries us all.

I'm thankful for god because without him none of the above would be possible. In the last seven months I have seen more miracles than I thought possible. I have felt fear like one couldn't imagine but through his grace, love and guidance have felt faith, happiness, love, hope and comfort. he has shown me to live for today and count the blessings I see in front of me and to not fear tomorrow or what could be. What could be doesn't exist. God works out all things and nothing is to big for him. God is good all the time. All of these obstacles that have placed in front of Hayden have seemed impossible yet she keeps overcoming and exceeding them!!! We truly can do all things through him who gives us strength. I'm literally witnessing miracles every day in my life and all around me! He has already healed my baby which is the greatest blessing of all time but he hasn't stopped there. He keeps bringing us more and more blessings than one could even imagine. I have definitely renewed my faith through this and that is something to be thankful for!

I don't think I am actually done with my list but Hayden wants to play dinosaur train fishing and that is really important right now!! I will be back later! God bless!!! :)